Director: Andrew Davis
Starring: Kevin Costner, Aston Kutcher, Sela Ward, Melissa Sagemiller
Reviewer: Reese
Kevin Costner is Ben Randall, a highly decorated, US Coast Guard rescue swimmer. When Costner's entire crew is killed during a dangerous rescue mission, Costner's commanding officer orders him to take a break from operational duty and to accept a job teaching at the Coast Guard school.
Enter Aston Kutcher: the young candidate at the school who's gung ho, too cheeky for his own good, and a really fantastic swimmer. And, oh yeah, Kevin Costner sees a little bit of himself in the young lad.
I'll be honest, I left the theatre shortly before this movie finished. Not as some kind of "I'm walking out, goddamnit" statement, but just because I was sooooo fucking bored that I truly could not watch anymore. Nothing was wrong with the actual plot structure of the film; that was all fine - but the major problem was this: nothing whatsoever was interesting about either of the major characters or either of their dumbass love interests (played by Sela Ward and Michelle "zzzz" Sagemiller). The characters were KILLER boring and the dialogue was worse. This movie has zero humour, zero suspense, zero drama ... and it just sucked major ass.
But I'll tell you this much, when you're part of an elite task force, like the US coast guard, or the Dairy Queen I manage which gets really busy in the summer, you learn a lot about leadership and taking taking care of your team. For example, last week I caught Jamal text messaging his friend when he was supposed to be mopping the floors. I sat him down and told him that at Glendale Dairy Queen we need to be the best of the best!! When he called me a name that I don't care to repeat, I told him he can consider himself "uninvited" to the next company mixer. I agree that the penalty was harsh, but I expect it will be an awfully long time before Jamal tries that stunt again!
This movie gets 1 out of 10. And the only reason it gets 1 (as opposed to zero) is because the camera operators obviously showed up, so that one point is for them.
0 comments:
Post a Comment